Maybe you don’t have to “come back”

A while back I spontaneously met a good friend of mine. We started talking about all sorts of things and after a while our conversation moved on to more serious topics as injuries, depression and so on. We talked about “coming back” and then she said something very important. Maybe you don’t have to come back.

So often when we find our self in a hard situation, a injury, a depression, a bad time in a relationship, all we want is to come back. Come back to how it used to be. Come back to what is normal. But coming back isn’t what we need?

Because life is constantly changing. You are constantly changing. So maybe coming back is just a search for something unattainable. A search that will leave you unfulfilled. Maybe what we instead have to do is accept that what once was will never come again and that instead of striving to get back we should strive to get somewhere else?

I was reminded about this now because it applies a lot to my current situation. For a long time (years I think) I’ve had struggle with my left shoulder. I feel pain especially from when I do a lot of handstands. Sometimes it’s fine, sometimes it’s worse, but I can feel it’s there. I have taken some short breaks every now and then to let it rest and I can feel it gets a lot better, but sooner or later it’s back again.

The reason? I just want to come back to handstands and not actually dealing with the problem.

About a week ago I made a big decision for me that I want to take my handbalancing to the next level. I want to give it all my attention and improve. This will need a lot of work and a lot of time on my hands. Something that I know my shoulder will not like.

So this big decision lead me to another big decision. I need to take a break from handstands. Not just a short break, but several weeks. Time to let it rest, to gather information about when and where I feel the pain, to do less of the things that hurts and do more of the things I can and slowly, slowly increase the demands on the shoulder and only then start to implement some handstands again.

So what is different this time compare to my previous breaks?

That this time I won’t rush it.

This time I have a plan.

This time I’m not striving to just “come back” and start exactly where I left it.

This time I think one step ahead.

This time I’m striving to be better by taking it slow, starting from the bottom, building the foundation and taking it step by step.

So what this means in practice is that for the next about 6 weeks I will rest from stuff that I know causes pain, which is: Handstands, Bridges, HSPU-work, OAC-work.

Instead I will focus on what I can do: Build basic strength, both in my shoulder and the rest of my body, improve my Split-flexibility, Floorwork and Acroyoga.

Even though I though it was a bit hard at first, because 6 weeks sounded like an eternity, now I’m actually a bit excited about this, to see where this will lead me.

Because after all, what is like 6-8 weeks without handstand when I plan to do it for like the rest of my life?

Finally, as always, if you read this text I genuinely thank you! It means a lot to me.

Now go and do some movement <3

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